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Offline Shopping VS Online Shopping: Rap Battle

Online Shopper: Today, you are a woman, you have a debit card

Offline Shopper: Yeah, whatever. Before the bank approved her, she shopped of through local markets with cash.

 

Me: Actually, I used my mom’s card online to buy books so having a card doesn’t make much difference. Cards are accepted offline so I didn’t carry cash. Also there’s cash on delivery option online.

 

Online Shopper: Whatever the case you gottu accept online shopping is better than offline shopping.

Offline Shopper: No way! Even before the internet came into existence there was just shopping!

Calling real shopping offline is so derogatory.

Online Shopper: We have taken over that’s the reality.

Offline Shopper: You-

 

Me: Uh guys. You actually are speaking in a rhyme. Having a rap battle is my call.

Both: Yes let’s get this sorted once and for all

Offline-Shopping-–-Why-not-Attract-the-Online-Shoppers

Me: *Gets ready with popcorn*

 

Offline Shopper

The road to the market is here to stay

Unlike the internet that has its negative variables

Shop what I want and what I might want any day

Let’s get this argument get settled

 

Instead of browsing,

Touch and feel

Where’s the guarantee of the quality

In the next best deal?

 

Who could know if it’s original or a copy?

Ever heard of retail therapy?

Nobody got time to pay the shipping charges at delivery

 Bargaining is my game, my strength my ability

 

Markets are easy to navigate

I can negotiate

On the internet you willingly chose to be fooled

Unsafe transactions and fraud is by what internet is ruled

Time zone difference

Currency interference

And what not,

Show me what you got!

 

Me: *Gets more popcorn*

 

Online Shopper

World-at-a-finger-tip

The world is just one click away

I have this power within my finger tips

Shop to my heart’s content everyday

No need for the crowded market trips

 

I got cheaper rates

No bargaining! Isn’t that great?

Discounts, coupons and sales

Arguing is such a big fail

The local market is limited

Internet makes everything arrive at my door step

That’s right you can get everything on internet

And not in your malls or street market

During shopping not a single word uttered

Best option for introverts

online-shopping-websites

Sit here, be there

I can be everywhere

Walk walk walk,

Talk talk talk

Person to person

Shop to shop, in the burning sun

Lose yourself, be exploited

Carry those heavy bags and fret

 

Save time with online shopping

Rather than wasting time searching

 

Ever heard of currency converter

Time zone is a boon; I can shop at midnight or whenever

 

I got reviews I can rely on

While you are all alone

I am with the trend

But you are too narrow-minded to understand

 

Offline Shopper and Online Shopper, raging with anger, ready to tear each other’s head off.

 

Me: Well I hate shopping.

 

*Both glance at me*

 

Me: Oops.

 

 

Image Source: [1], [2], [3], [4] 

About Mariyam Saigal

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